She is Married to Her Feline Husbands and Happy

Ms Buchner and her twin cat "husbands"!
Ms Buchner and her twin cat “husbands”!
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We know it happens, quite a lot and this is a good, well publicised, example. The lady is Barbarella Buchner. She is “married” to feline husbands Spider and Lugosi. Her attachment to her tabby cats is advertised to the world in the tattoo on her right leg of their initials.

Barbarella says, “My two cats are my soul mates”. Barbarella lives in Lanzarote, Canary Islands and she married both cats in July 2004. Both Spider and Lugosi are 14 years of age. Her previous relationship to a human being caused the usual arguments. She says that being in a relationship with Spider and Lugosi is different.

“I’m definitely happily married to them. I’m not alone, I have my cats now. I have no regrets and I don’t care what people say.”

It seems that Barbarella has converted a love of cats into something more noticeable. She has almost committed herself to doing away with the conventional concept of marriage and decided that the best and most stable relationship is between her and her cats. This would seem to be a permanent arrangement with no going back to the conventions of a human relationships.

Barbarella has had conventional relationships with men and the last one she had, before she married Spider and Lugosi, ended in tears. She cried four weeks after they split but her cats help her through that difficult time, she says. She cried into their fur. They helped to keep her calm.

She says that her love for her cats is much deeper than anything she has felt for a human being.

Because of her love for her cats she decided to formalise it into a marriage and found a website called marryyourpet.com which provided a certificate of marriage. She was extremely happy to have that certificate. She felt she had to do it. Soon after the marriage to her cats, who, incidentally, are twin brothers from a rescue organisation, she relocated to Lanzarote to make a fresh start.

Some people have called her a bigamist for marrying two cats! She seems to have taken that accusation seriously. She says that her love is pure, spiritual and unconditional. Once her feline husbands have passed on she says that she will not marry again either to a human or a cat. If a man approaches she tells them straightaway that she is married to cats.

She found that her relationship with her ex live-in boyfriend worked at first but then he became lazy. She discovered that she was always cleaning up after him whereas her relationship with her cats is different because she accepts that they are cats. She spoils them rotten and feeds them with a raw meat diet which is very expensive. In fact, feeding her cats is more expensive than feeding herself. Ms Buchner is totally devoted to them and would do anything for them. She says,

“there is no limit to what I do. If someone abused my cats I would do something serious to them. I wouldn’t kill the abuser though because then I would have to go to jail and my cats wouldn’t have me anymore.”

She says despite her cats being twins Spider is the gentle submissive soul and Lugosi is the boss. There is a pecking order between them. Her one-bedroom flat in Lanzarote is completely “catified”. There appears to be no end to the catification of her flat including a special toilet seat and a wardrobe of outfits which is decorated with pictures of cats. She has spent thousands of pounds on cat items.

They have been her companions for 14 years which means that it is the longest relationship that she has had in her life.

All cat lovers will understand her emotions and what she is saying. Barbarella has gone a step further than normal but in essence she’s just living with her cats in a stable relationship as a substitute for a human relationship with which many people can empathize.

6 thoughts on “She is Married to Her Feline Husbands and Happy”

  1. Its a good article Michael, but I think you have written about Barberella before as i can remember and if I am not wrong, but thank you <3

    Reply
  2. lol good for her, I’d far rather marry a cat than any man, but the sad thing for her will be that the odds are that her husbands won’t live as long as she does. Will she remarry then? 😉
    A bit off topic but I had a friend who said he would rather marry the van he drove, than any woman lol

    Reply
    • LOL1
      I would rather marry any inanimate object before a man, even my soap dish.
      Good god! Look at them today.
      Swishy, whimpy, couldn’t saw a board if their life depended on it, empty promises…
      And, if they can’t hang a picture or curtain rod, run for your life!

      Reply

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