Boyfriend won’t let her adopt a shelter cat and she is in tears

Boyfriend won't let me adopt a rescue cat
Boyfriend won’t let her adopt a rescue cat. You need both parties in relationship to agree to adopt a cat. However, I’m not sure that I like the fact that she appears to be treating the boyfriend as the person in charge of the relationship. Screenshot.
Until September 7th I will give 10 cents to an animal charity for every comment. It is a way to help animal welfare without much effort at no cost. Comments help this website too, which is about animal welfare.

This is a post which I have a lot of sympathy with so I want to share it. The lady uploads a picture of a shelter cat saying that her boyfriend won’t let her adopt him “and I’m in tears”. She decided to show the cat to subscribers. I guess she was looking for some feedback and she got it, lots of it as usual on this heavily used website. And the moderators, it seems to me, have put a red circle around what they judge to be the favourite comment. The person who made that comment is unequivocal in her opinion namely, “Don’t get pets until you have your stuff together. It’s not fair to the animal and if you live with your boyfriend this is also something he has a say in”.

Below is the entire comment:

“I’m the only person who is going to say let someone more capable adopt the cat. Don’t get pets until you have your stuff together. It’s not fair to the animal and if you live with your boyfriend this is also something he has a say in. They will destroy furniture and it’s a full-time job to properly take care of a cat. I asked for months if we could and finally when we were better off financially and had a regimented schedule my fiancé said he felt comfortable with two kittens. I’m so tired of people just adopting pets because they’re cUtE but not realizing how much work goes into it and how the other housemates negative attitude can affect the animal.”

I totally get that. It’s rather strange because I wrote on a very similar topic a couple of days ago. It’s a tough call and the comment is quite tough but I think you have to be quite tough and self-disciplined when it comes to adopting a cat companion. You can’t go into it casually in a self-indulgent way. This is a major project and a life changing one. If you adopt a kitten you are going to live with a cat for at least 15 years which is a sizeable chunk out of your life. It isn’t cheap either if you do a good job.

Perhaps one problem is that people adopt cats without the intention of caring for them for his or her life. In the back of their mind, they have the option that they can always relinquish the cat to a shelter. They don’t commit. If they committed to a minimum 15-year project they wouldn’t adopt. Sometimes, this would be a better outcome for a cat because I often read stories of cats being adopted and then returned to the shelter. This can go on two or three times. See and example below:

ASSOCIATED PAGE: ‘Nice’ older couple gave up their rescue cat because they chose an apartment with better amenities

Another commenter, who is a TNR volunteer, states that without her boyfriend putting the brakes on cat adoption she would have adopted too many cats. She lives with three already. And she recommends that a way to satisfy one’s desire to live with a cat is to foster them. You have temporary caretaking duties until you find an owner. I tried this and failed because the first time that I had to raise a kitten I fell in love with him and couldn’t release him to an owner. That was the end of my fostering days. But if you have the right mentality, cat fostering is a good way to enjoy relationships with different cats. You also do a good service for cat welfare generally.

The moral of the story (if it needs stating) is that if you live with a boyfriend or a spouse of any kind you make a joint decision to adopt a cat and you commit to the project totally and unequivocally for the lifetime of that precious creature.


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