My not so gentle giant, MAXIMUS

My husband and I have loved and lost 10 sweet cats over the last 20 years. We nursed them each as far as we were able, then one or both of us were with them at the end to bid farewell. Your heart is broken, but time will sooth it and your happy memories of Maximus will make you smile. Do I believe our pets are in heaven? Yes, I do. They are given to us in trust and I don't think God will take them away from us in heaven any more than He would take our family members from us. Take care.

Hi Gwen,

I understand what you're feeling. We recently lost one of our feline family members. She was doing fine, and within days was very ill. She had cancer in a location very difficult to remove. Such surgery would have also taken away the independance that is such a part of being a cat. I was with her when the vet administered those final shots... I couldn't let her die with strangers. She was a good friend for well over a decade and can never be replaced. Now, months later, I still tear up when I think of her not being around. In my heart, she's still with me.

Hi Gwen. This was very sad news indeed and I feel so sorry, knowing how much Maximus meant to you. Having to say goodbye to an affectionate friend is the hardest part of living with cats, but it comes to everybody some day.
You did the right thing, because hospitalization would only have prolonged his suffering with nothing but a very slim chance of recovery. It is part of human responsibility to decide when the time has come to stop treatment and you took that upon yourself. It's never easy, I know.
Maximus was a fine cat and had deserved many more years. I'm sure he will live on in your memory forever and also with many of us here.

Gwen I am so sad to read your news and nothing anyone can say can help much I know.
You never get over losing a much loved pet but with time you start to accept them not being around.
I have been heartbroken many times at the loss of our cats over the years so I do know how you feel.
I think you made the right decision because hospitalisation for a cat is terrifying,they do hate to be away from home. Maximus would more than likely have died there with strangers as he was so very ill, so try to take comfort he was at home,you were with him and he knew that, and that he also knew you loved him very much.
R.I.P dear Maximus.
Take care Gwen
xx

Gwen, I'm so sorry to read of your loss of Maximus, each and every cat is so special and so unique and the space left when they leave us is unbearable. No words are adequate, just know there are other people on this site who have also lived with the horror of what you're going through at the moment so we understand. Maximus was well loved and he obviously loved you totally too. RIP Maximus.

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened."

Wednesday night, my Maximus passed away.
I am really grieving and just wanted to post as a tribute to him and to all sweet furry friends who have moved on and left us changed.

I took my sweet Max in to the vet, and they found that he had a certain specific feline anemia, where his body was destroying his red blood cells.

He was doing okay, but then quickly took a turn for the worse, and his red blood cell count dropped really low. The $ to give him the blood transfusions and hospitalization he needed became too much. (multiple thousands) How do you deal with that decision? I just cried and cried to the vet.

There was a chance he could still fight back on his own, so I brought him home and administered the drugs to help him fight. We laid on the floor for 4 hours and “talked” through it while he fought. As usual he was so funny- we were having staring contests, and I would say “you still fighting?” and he’d say “reeoww reeooooow”, & we went back and forth like that, until he would nap, and I would nap, and then he’d wake up & we’d do that again- for literally hours. He got better, but then took a turn, and went downhill fast from there. I just.. couldn’t do Anything to save him. I lost him at about 10pm Wed night.

I'm just so heartbroken. I can’t hardly stand it. I just couldn’t believe it- it was so fast. We were just playing in the plants 3 days ago. I feel like I would beg, borrow & steal now to get the $ to have him back.

I know you’re all cat lovers and understand the loss. So I thought maybe this would be a good place to reach out for some comforting words. I would appreciate any thoughts from anyone who's also grieved the loss of their friend.

Maximus was amazing, and loving and loud and gigantic and cuddly and moody and so, so loved. Thank you for all your advice and kind thoughts.

Lastly, please hug and kiss your sweet furry friends extra, extra hard today... for me & sweet Max.

Gwen

Great picture. I've got a huge MC myself (25 lbs).

If you're sure about the food being the point of contention and you feed him dry food, get an automatic feeder. My MC had a similar problem. He would constantly hound me to fill his dish--this was especially true when my vet told me to start him on a diet.

The auto feeder disassociates me from the feeding process. In that way, my MC doesn't "hold it against me" for little food, no food, etc. The feeder just delivers its measured quantity on its given schedule and I'm not involved in the process. No grudges.

NOTE. There are big differences in feeders. The "pet mate" ones are not very good at all. The "super feeder" is outstanding--a little hard to fill; however, no problems.

Good luck. Aloha, Brian.

He's gorgeous, just have him checked over for your own peace of mind. Purrs to you both.

Hi Gwen. I like the positive way you took the comments and hopefully it will help Maximus back to his old gentle self. A cat this big is really special, but also a bit scary if it gets grumpy. Hopefully nothing serious is wrong, but please have him checked. Good luck to you both. 🙂

Hi again Gwen, how refreshing it is to meet someone who asks for advice then doesn't turn on people who give it, if it isn't what they want to hear !
This just shows you truly do love your Maximus.
I hope you have his problem solved soon and have many more happy years together.
Do let us know how he gets on please.

Hi Gwendolyn, I get a strong feeling that you are a very loving human companion to the big guy.

Being away a lot can be a problem. When I was working (I am retired now and do this website at home) my lady cat used to get a bit p*ss*d off with me for being out so much. I didn't like that I was not there for her.

I don't know what food you feed him. Dry food only is not considered good but is convenient if we are out a lot. I used to fed dry food a lot as advised by the vet and he was wrong.

Cats don't tend to compensate enough by drinking more water when they only eat dry food, in my experience.

Some vets think that commercial dry food can cause health issues such as diabetes. Feeding wet food is the best way with perhaps some dry food grazing from time time time.

Okay, thanks guys. I only picked him up this way to show his size, but I won't be doing that anymore as I feel sufficiently scolded. (Don't want to hurt him.)

Michael- THANK YOU for the thoughts/input. He does urinate a LOT, and eats more than I do! So the diabetes thing worries me - I am taking him to the vet ASAP to check that. Mostly he is very happy and loving. But he's alone a lot (I work a lot) so I think that may also be a part of what is agitating him. I give him so much attention and love when I'm home, but the sweet big guy always wants more. I just feel like he needs more entertainment.

Regarding the toys, playing, etc.- I have a box FULL of sad little Maximus-toys I've bought him that he dismissed after 2 seconds. He's a complete "toy-snob" and will have nothing to do with them. He does have a scratch post that he uses. But the only thing I've ever gotten him to play with is a certain house plant that he just loves, and a broken guitar string! (I just leave it broken on the guitar because he loves to bat it around so much.)

As I said, mostly he's a happy, cuddly wonderful cat. But he is definitely not shy about letting me know ANY time he's not happy. (I just have to add that his meow is not this cute little trill I've read others describe. Rather, it's something more like a loud banshee shriek.) Haha, he's special. I love my little (giant) banshee.

So I'm trying to be a good mama & figure out the source of anything causing him distress. THANKS everyone & I'll let you know anything interesting from the vet.

🙂 Gwen

Poor Maximus,the same old story,he was the baby until the real baby came along!
My blood ran cold at the way you are holding him,yes the dead fish hold causes cats harm.
Even posing for a photo like that is too much strain on a cats front end.
No matter how big Maximus is,he is a cat,he is not a child or a dog.He needs cats games, scratching post,toys,running around after something type games.He is probably bored witless so has taken to playing stalking in the hopes of some exercise.
I'd invest in a good book about the needs and behaviour of cats if I were you.

As petite as you are it seems you are still able to lift Maximus so I don't think you need be too scared of being overpowered by him, but I think that some of the problem could be in the way you lift him, as has already been mentioned by Ruth. The "dead fish" hold puts a lot of strain around the chest and upper body area and the tight grip necessary to hold such a large boy combined with his weight pulling on him could bruise his chest or pull the muscles in his forelegs or upper back. We rarely pick up our cats because it seems an invasion of their personal space unless they come asking to be lifted, but when we do it's the "cats cradle" lift we use, making sure the weight of the back end is supported and not pulling on the front end.

Perhaps Maximus sees his food as his security, if he isn't very overweight I wouldn't worry too much other than having him checked over by the vet next time his vaccinations are due. The thing to bear in mind with cats is than whatever size they are they are not mini dogs, they have their own ways and we have to respect them, I think Max had a bit of a sad time before he came to you, he was "got rid of" and that isn't nice for any cat. Plenty of love and attention, fun and strenuous games to tire him out will keep him happy, healthy and make him too tired to stalk you.

I am back from the gym...

Is there an increase in appetite and/or increased urination? It sounds not but if there were it might be the early stages of diabetes.

If he was hungry having diabetes and he was being dieted (because he was a bit overweight) he might be stressed and as a consequence, aggressive without good apparent cause.

Just a thought, no more.

What a beautiful big boy Maximus is ! I hope you won't take this as criticism but you should never pick up or hold a cat without supporting his whole weight.You need to lift him from his middle and at the same time make a sort of seat with one hand for his back end.
I think with Maximus this will be pretty difficult but not picking up or holding a cat properly puts strain on their front end and can lead to problems.
If this has been happening to him before you got him and how you lift him now it may be why he's turning grumpy, he may be in pain.I'd have him checked over by a vet if I was you as he could be suffering from arthritis.
Apart from that always treat him very gently, he may be a big cat but he is still a vulnerable creature and cats start to be on the defensive if anyone or anything makes them nervous.
He also needs a BIG tall strong scratching post and lots of catnip toys, to take his attention from food sometimes.