Social Media Pet Identity Theft
by Furby the Feral Feline
(Hodges, SC)
OMC I'm Being Impersonated!
Hi everybody! It's Furby! Today I want to talk about social media pet identity theft. Human critters, you need to leave the room because this story is just for your cats. So gather your cats around the computer. Um...maybe you humans better stick around in case your cat can't read this...
Cats, did you know that almost half of all Facebook pages are examples of pet identify theft? You heard right. That dear sweet owner of yours may be impersonating you on Facebook, Twitter, Catster, MySpace and who knows where else. Of course, cats are much more popular than dogs. I think cats do a lot more thinking than dogs and we're more likely to speak our minds.
I have a page on Facebook under Furby the Feral Feline. I'll admit I haven't been on there in awhile now. I'm on something called "restriction" because I used my human mama as a launching pad and forgot to put my claws in. So the top of her head had a few holes for awhile. It's not like anyone saw them under all that hair of hers. Sorry mama.
Anyway, I run my own Facebook page because I can read and write. Mama did put one thing on my bio I don't like. She said I have a smart mouth. Me? I don't think so. And if I did, where does she think I got it from! I did find a few entries on there I didn't make. Unless I was under the influence of catnip. Never mind...
My adopted daughter Midnight Munchkin Whineybutt has her own regular page on Facebook. I'll tell you all a secret. Mama is "pretending" to be Midnight. Every cat knows cats can't read and type at the age Midnight got her page. I was at least four months old before I learned to read and then it took a few more months before I learned to type.
Twitter is also a major site for social media pet identity theft. There are several famous cats on there including Sockington, CalibanTheCat, MimiTheCat, Pantherthecat and arielthecat. These cats have THOUSANDS of Twitter people. Can I ask someone what a Twitter is? Any why am I not on there?
Mama, why am I NOT on TWITTER? See, she can't even do a complete job of impersonating me! It's just not fair! What mama? I AM on Twitter. And I'm just now finding this out...
Fellow cats, what are we going to do about this? Can we get approval for cats to start impersonating their humans on these sites? We can't sue our humans because that could cut into our catnip/cat toy funds. I suggest we try sitting on the computer to monitor what our humans do using our identity.
I'd like to assure everybody at pictures-of-cats.org that I did write all of my Furby stories for my Godfather Michael. No pet identify theft was committed on any of those articles.
Cats, please tell me whether your owners are impersonating you anywhere. What are we going to do about this? Someone has to come up with a plan or our humans (a.k.a. the traitors)will continue to make fun of us against our knowledge on these social media sites.
Oh, mama says I'm on Twitter under furbyshouse. I guess I need to go there and learn to do whatever it is Twitter does.
I'll be back when I think of something else to write about.
Furby the Feral Feline